I asked powerful women in martial arts how training in their discipline helped them overcome issues, be stronger leaders and become more confident in themselves and less-self conscious of their bodies. I received so many replies from amazing women I decided to do a Martial Arts Mini Series. I hope you enjoy their stories of strength and endurance as much as I do.
Susan Harrow
Martial Arts for Women: Presence and Intent Helps Resolve Conflict Quickly
By Ginny Breeland
Call me the reluctant aikidoka. I was a skeptic (not a cynic), a doubting Thomas (not a disbeliever), and a pragmatist (not a non-conformist). For a length of time Aikido was nothing to me but exercise. 30 years ago my sister dragged me into my first Aikido class. I was 18 ys old and knew nothing of the art, but such things happen for reasons for it was there that I met my future husband, #1 fan, and uke, Pete. Regardless of how it all began, Aikido has had a profound impact on my life.
It may have been my size, 5′ 100 lbs that led me to question whether I could really do this art. The philosophy seemed too esoteric. But since I was a good student, I learned the techniques and my husband and I continued practicing. He, my mentor and my security blanket. We practiced for years and progressed. When I got my black belt I was still insecure but felt I better attend to my studies more seriously because here I now stood with this great big black flag called a hakama.
How has it affected my business? I have worked as a cytotechnologist in a pathology lab for the last 25 years. Doctors were my bosses and I had always done my job quietly and efficiently. I kept my good opinions to myself even when I disagreed with conclusions and diagnosis. Aikido gave me the confidence and foresight to be able to stand toe to toe with my superiors. Notice, toe to toe, not head to head (or headlong).
Aikido taught me how to approach indirectly and end up side by side. I was able to get my opinions heard and acknowledged. The model of conflict resolution that constructs Aikido physically had entered my interaction off the mat. I began to understand. Aikido allowed me to make my point with no threat, and with more certainty. It often left my superiors confused but not antagonized. In Aikido you make his intent your intent so your intent can be ‘heard’. It also taught me how to give respect and receive respect as well. It changed how people at work approached me and some were puzzled.
With my 2nd degree black belt I started to teach, again with reluctance, after all what could I teach a 6 foot tall man? But this was the greatest opportunity of growth. Sometimes I messed up, so I understood what it meant to invest in loss, because I learned. At the time I only had begun to carry myself with confidence, thank goodness my Sensei knew more about me than I did. But I still felt not taken seriously as a woman, men walked past me to train with other men. I decided it was my presence. My brain had to be fixed. here was nothing I could do about my size and gender, but a lot I could do about my Presence.
When I became 3rd degree black belt the growth continued. It was a very physical time of learning. I consumed every style and training I could while balancing a family and job. I practiced many styles but kept my Iwama core. The problem was it just a very good outer physical core. It was really not until I was a 4th degree black belt that I suddenly felt one with my sword and jo. What a surprising feeling. I had thought I had accomplished this long ago, when I knew all the katas and taught them. But not really, now this oneness was an epiphany. I learned the dimensions like words. The differences between attention, concentration, and focus. These words are not the same and yet I had treated them so. Once again I was humbled and decided to take some steps back and stop assuming I knew. Truth was, the more you know, the more you do not know.
It was at this time of immense growth that life collapsed when my son became seriously ill and permanently disabled. Sometimes it is through the randomness and the wanderings in life that the depth and severity of existence is revealed. Through trauma, life change, or the simple pursuit for deeper meaning do we discover the path for simple existence. What was complex was now easy. What was arduous was now a daily endeavor, and what was difficult has oddly a shown pathway of the coexistence of joy and pain. Since our bodies carry our histories, when I returned to Aikido, a couple of years later, I had totally changed and so had my Aikido. Techniques became more acute, basics were the advanced material. I dispensed with useless showy movement. The universe had shifted from me to now my uke being the center of the universe and I in the periphery. I also felt a responsibility to contribute in helping humanity.
O Sensei had a military position in WWII as it began and perhaps of what he witnessed caused him to retreat into the country and create Aikido. The art that resolves conflict preserving both attacker and defender. He manipulated limbs to their natural extent and immobilized his opponents with closed circles (arm locks) or open circles (throwing uke) limbs were manipulated to full extent but not broken. What was his motivation? The atrocities of war? Aikido is known as the art of peace.
In all martial arts there are more similarities then differences. Masters get past the physical and encourage avoidance of conflict as well. Better to move like a shadow, respond like an echo, rest like a mirror, conform like water.
In our daily lives how can this affect us? What are we able to do even though we do not practice any martial arts? And if we do, how do we past the physical? The physical in martial arts is necessary, though other work can lead toward understanding service and peace. Commitment and arduous work in one form or another is all that is required. Some of what we can do is:
- Do your best everyday.
There are few perfect warriors, our goal is to try and be impeccable. - Live like and respect nature.
Accept things as they are, follow the natural course of things and be patient, don’t always expect instant results. - Be aware.
Look so you can really ‘see’. Hear so you can feel what is happening around you. Feel so you can sense. Follow but be the first to move. - Have compassion with wisdom so limits are not exhausted.
Care for every being not just those you can gain from but the disheartened and the lost. - Tend to your own fruitfulness.
Claim your own space. Meditate, Laugh, be Brave. Be in the company of those who promote health.
Martial arts provides a physical meditation. Hard work, leaving your zone of comfort, willingness and open mindedness allow you to arrive at the door to be ready to be of service to others much sooner than simply wanting to look good. As we move along with life we realize that what we thought was our own learning should ultimately transfer into a desire to teach and care for others like nature with no discrimination and no expectations in return. There are many pitfalls along the way. Aikido has illuminated dimensions for me and still I know there is more. I continue to study as it never ends, it is a lifelong process.
Ginny Breeland, 5th Dan, studied Exfoliative Cytology at the UCSF Medical center and has worked in a Pathology lab for over 25 years as a Cytotechnologist. Ginny has combined studying the brain and the art and science of learning/teaching. She and her husband, Pete, have trained for over 30 years and teach at Cotati Aikido. Ginny has taught Aikido for over ten years, integrating ideas on brain science, the balance between the right and left, yin and yang, the body and logic, the unconscious and the conscious. Ginny uses all of this in her mission to make Aikido accessible to anyone and everyone.
Favorite Morihei Ueshiba (founder of Aikido) quote: “The Art of Peace begins with you. Work on yourself and your appointed task in the Art of Peace. Everyone has a spirit that can be refined, a body that can be trained in some manner, a suitable path to follow…apply the Art to all that you encounter.”
