Susan Harrow

Martial Arts Background
I began my Aikido training in January 1982 at age thirty-three. I carry the rank of 6th degree black belt. I am the founder and director of Society of Aikido Centers since 2002.

How has martial arts helped you in your business?
Being an Aikido teacher has become my business career. It has helped me to focus on one thing at a time as we were taught in randori (freestyle). That being in a calm state helps us make better decisions. Whereas I was shy, I learned to be assertive.

Are you a better leader?
I continue to develop myself personally to be a better leader. The expansion of going through the personal transformation compelled me to write my first publication “The Martial Art of Life, The Art of Intentional Living” which is about the concepts that helped the self-actualization to take place.

How has training in martial arts has changed the way you feel about your body?
In 1982, at age 33 and being 5′1″ and 84 lbs, I studied martial arts for self-defense reasons. I was shy, reactive and took most things personally. My self-esteem was not very high. In the study of Aikido, you begin to learn about the mind, body, and spirit connection. As we learn to manage energy, we connect with our spirit. By connecting to our spirit, you can connect with intent. The whole basis behind Aikido is rooted in intent.

As I began to develop in the art, I learned how to use my body in a way which wasn’t based on physical strength. The mind and spirit have no size and I found the mental and spiritual aspects especially intriguing. Only when I saw myself in photos or videos, then I understood why others made such comments about my small stature. However, as I continued to train and focus on internal energy, the students on the receiving end began to feel the power of my movements. Something had changed and my perception of myself was transforming. What my size reflected was not my identity.

When you started what has the training taught you?
It has taught me that we create an image of ourselves and others are picking up the vibration of how we feel about ourselves. If we focus on our lack of, they feel it. If we focus on self-development, we will always be successful.

I went through a personal struggle in the beginning of my training since I couldn’t understand how my size could be effective. I was frustrated and from the student’s perspective it looked like I wouldn’t survive, but my spirit would not allow it.

Where you are now and how has it affected your image of yourself?
It is now twenty-eight years later. In 2002, in my twentieth year I created my own organization, Society of Aikido Centers. It also placed me in a position of being the first female to head an international Aikido organization in the U.S. I was discovering who I was being the “leader” which meant being the creator, innovator and learning how to manage the organization which consisted of 90% male students. Throughout my training because of my physical stature, my rank and being a female, I was consistently tested by the male students. I had to learn this art and learn it well. Now in my early sixties at 5′1″ and 96 lbs. with six grandchildren, I am still discovering the creativity of this profound art. When you make changes on the inside, the outside will change on its own. It is better to be the real you because when you root your movements in fear, it is always wrong.
What could help other women feel calm, centered and confident?
I teach using ’soft gaze’ in my classes. Being in soft gaze allows a person to see the attackers in an unfocussed way, to look at them as part of a scene as opposed to looking at them directly. By doing this they can center very easily in the same way when someone walks behind them. By staying calm and feeling the situation, the field of energy, then you will know when to move. It’s that field of energy fluctuation that is the information necessary to move before you are touched. The way to be centered is not to focus. You can immediately feel the switch from being apprehensive, fearful and reactive to feeling calm, centered and being responsive in the moment. I encourage the students to use it as often as they can to heighten their awareness. This is one of the best tips I would give anyone.

I’d like to hear a dramatic, moving, profound before and after story.
Although I was making great strides in my profession as an Aikido instructor, there were challenges in my personal life that needed to be understood. I felt encumbered by past issues, issues in the present and fears that there was nothing I could change and the very fear of change. When I look back I could see that this encapsulated my life and showed in my appearance and in my beliefs.

Then a door opened and the concepts were through that door. The concepts which were given to me to write the book are profound and different from the traditional Aikido principles. High spiritual beings channeled through a medium instructed me on understanding of how the universe works. This is when things started to develop. I didn’t feel alone anymore and I became a little bit stronger. As I became stronger, I pushed away the negativities in my life. I wrote how these concepts of the universe work and I am now passionate about my life, my endeavors, my focus and my destiny. Once you begin on this path, there is no going back. I was actually teaching these concepts without applying them because I did not know they could be applied. I use these concepts more all the time and even when I begin to feel otherwise, I mentally say “I’m capable of handling this.” These concepts change your existence.

Lynn Fabia is an Aikido teacher (6th degree black belt), lecturer and author. She has always had a deep desire for higher understanding. Although she was making great strides in her profession as an Aikido instructor, there were challenges in her personal life that needed to be understood. My journey began as one who was shy, reactive and fearful of many things, causing me to be limited in my understanding of life. Then a door opened and the life concepts were through that door that took me to a place in my mind and spirit that changed my life forever. Her book “The Martial Art of Life, The Art of Intentional Living” is based on the teachings of high spiritual beings that have availed her the opportunity to learn some of the most powerful tools in mankind’s interactions. Read her personal transformation to self-actualization.

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Susan Harrow

How has doing martial arts helped you in your business?  Martial arts have given me more focus, discipline and confidence over the years in both sales and marketing for major fashion designers and now running my own art business.

Are you a better leader?  I feel that I am a more confident leader. I also have learned through martial arts that you cannot B.S. yourself. Either you have what it takes to enter the fray, you develop what you need or you stay out of harm’s way.

How has training in martial arts has changed the way you feel about your body?  Since I was a model for several years–including swim wear and lingerie–I have always had a good body image. However martial arts gave me an additional and fun way to stay in shape. And frankly, when you have a good body you need confidence to say “no” to a lot of people in a lot of situations.

I’d like to hear dramatic, moving, profound before and after stories. Where you started, what training has taught you, where you are now and how it’s affected your image of yourself. I first started training right after I married my husband artist Pablo Solomon. He had trained since childhood and was a master of several styles ( he even did classes for the Queen’s Guard in the Netherlands). However, he felt that I would benefit more if I had a teacher other than him. So he had me train with a Chinese master of Wing Chun literally in a room in the back of the guy’s restaurant–real movie stuff. The Wing Chun style was actually started by a female Buddhist monk several hundred years ago. It depends on slipping and deflecting attacks. I had never done anything like this before and it was both interesting and made me feel as if I could defend myself.

Actually, I never had to use my martial arts directly (although on our honeymoon in Mexico we were attacked on a moon light walk on the beach and Pablo kicked the crap out of three attackers using jujitsu throws). However, the alertness and confidence that I had gained saved my life at least once. I was working for Diane von Furstenberg in sales and marketing and was returning to my car on an open parking lot after a sales meeting. I could see a man stalking me and trying to circle me to approach me. I had an umbrella with me so I just dropped my briefcase and purse, took a strong stance and pointed my umbrella menacingly at the guy and shouted in a command voice “get away!” The guy was so shocked he actually left like a scared dog.

I’m also after concrete tips that would help other women become more calm, centered, confident.The best tip I can give is to use breathing, posture and focus at all times ( yoga is good for this also). The number one practical tip is to be alert and aware of your surroundings. Also, trust your instincts. If a situation feels wrong–get out. Do not worry about appearing paranoid, insensitive, etc. Just listen to that internal alarm and move. Also, always fight. It is better to be taken to the hospital from a parking lot after resisting and being shot or stabbed than to be kidnapped and raped and tortured to death over a long period of torment.

I’m particularly interested in Aikido because of the “way of harmony” philosophy and since I began training a year ago. Aikido is a hybrid of Japanese sword technique and jujitsu. Pablo is very good at Aikido as well as several other arts. His comment is that Aikido is very good but requires many years of training to reach a point where it will do you a lot of good on the street. His advice to me and most other women is to carry an ice pick. If you are too timid to rip out a rapist’s eyes, you probably don’t really value your life very much.

Please let me know the type of martial arts you do, how long you’ve been training, and your rank. I have trained formally and with Pablo for the 35 years of our marriage. Let’s just say that I can defend myself. As Pablo who has taught martial arts around the world says, ” A real master worries more about his belt holding up his pants than about its color impressing others.”

My name is Beverly Solomon and am currently Creative Director for musee-solomon. I was a model and then an account executive in sales and marketing for Diane von Furstenberg, Revlon and Ralph Lauren. I now live and work with my husband internationally recognized artist Pablo Solomon on our 1856 historic ranch in the Texas Hill Country north of Austin. I manage our art business and also provide expertise in the areas of art, fashion and beauty. I have been featured in books, newspapers, magazines and TV. You can see me at http://www.beverlysolomon.com/

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I asked powerful women in martial arts how training in their discipline helped them overcome issues, be stronger leaders and become more confident in themselves and less-self conscious of their bodies. I received so many replies from amazing women I decided to do a Martial Arts Mini Series. I hope you enjoy their stories of strength and endurance as much as I do. 

Susan Harrow

Congratulations to you for practicing in the martial arts. It is really a calming approach to staying fit.

My main reason for staring MMA two years ago was medically based. I was diagnosed with an early form of breast cancer in 2007 at the age of 35 and after my surgeries, my doctors at Sloan Kettering told me I had to log a minimum of five hours of exercise each week.

I grew up as a ballerina, but realized as an adult I really didn’t love it. I also went to the gym from time to time, but never got the warm and fuzzy from it. What I did find and has propelled me forward on so many levels is the practice of Mixed Martial Arts. It is such an intense workout and the fact that you partner with another person each time is very motivating. You then have the ability to build friendships and look forward not only to the workout, but the individuals who you will also see on the mat. The individuals I generally partner with understand my limitations and work with me.

I am currently a green belt and am more than half-way towards my black belt. I am still working on my body image. Looking at me, you would say what?!? However, I think each person has their own criticisms about their body.

My husband notices how my body has changed over the past two years and it for the better. It is more sculpted and having a strong core is very important for the function of your body. I have always been a confident person, but having MMA training adds and greater sense of confidence and centeredness. Plus there is a great amount of respect that we have for the individuals who teach the skill, our Sensei or Joshu’s (teacher’s). MMA also provides a release as you are encouraged to make noise such as a loud “ki-yah” on the mat during your training session.

The ranking is not what drives me, but rather the feeling, energy and sense of calm that I experience from MMA. Plus, each time I mention that I practice MMA in a networking environment, people are intrigued. The conversation takes an interesting path since most people I meet in the networking environment do not practice in MMA.

Laney Liner, Owner of Blue Thunder Creative Group, Inc., as more than 15 years of graphic design and marketing experience to support her clients and bring success to each engagement. She provides the tools to help clients generate more income. Over the years, Laney has worked with clients including American Express, Barnes & Noble, The New York Times, Eastman Kodak, US Navy, The Bank of New York and Verizon.

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Photo by Elisabeth Sophia Fuchs, Vienna, Austria

Being overly sensitive to how people judge us isn’t always a sign of low self-esteem; confident women also worry about how other’s view them. We are supposed to be perfect so we work hard to maintain this status. As a successful high-achiever, I have had to learn to take risks, love myself even when I make mistakes, and appreciate my aging body.

I learned my greatest lesson in loving myself in my first improvisational acting class. I attended a week-long camp in the woods in New York. I fumbled and mumbled through every scene and hid out from my fellow campers in the evening. I knew I looked stupid and couldn’t wait to get home.

Then I met Carol Fox Prescott. After begrudgingly performing a short song and dance on stage, she blocked my retreat and told me to repeat the performance. I did. She made me do it again. I did. She said, “Until you arouse every man in this room, you can’t leave this stage.” I saw myself as a corporate trainer and keynote speaker, not a sex object. I was instructional and motivating, not seductive. She made me perform again. And again. The angrier I got, the more I belted out my song and thrusted my big butt and hips around the stage. 

After the ninth rendition, everyone cheered, hooted and whistled. I fell to the floor in tears. Carol took my hand and said, “You have disconnected from your sexuality. Until you find this beautiful part of yourself and share it with the world, you will never fully connect with your audience or anyone else in your life.” I knew in my soul that she was right.

Carol brought me back in touch with the silly, sexy, loving woman that I had lost contact with in all my years of being the perfect achiever. While trying to be the perfect performer, I was not being authentic. Now, being perfectly authentic became my goal, a nobler aspiration than trying to look and act with precision.

Another acting coach Gary Austin told me, “It’s none of your business what people think of you.” He says your business is to give 100% to what you are trying to accomplish. “For every moment you give to thinking about how someone is judging you, you are detracting from your best performance. Quit worrying about what people are thinking and you will perform so well that their opinions of you won’t matter.” Gary helped me to see the pleasure in giving 100% and that people love my messy, silly, imperfect self even more than the “confident high-achiever” self I tried so hard to uphold. I may not sing and dance on stage, but I laugh whole-heartedly with my audience and even at myself.

*If you want to know about how the brain works, check out Outsmart Your Brain: How to Make Success Feel Easy by Marcia Reynolds on Amazon or http://www.outsmartyourbrain.com/.

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Check this out — Booties to go.
While this product may not help your health, it can cause a heads to turn bolstering your self-esteem…

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In that moment she made the decision to go on the date just to see what it was like to be with someone who didn’t like Her. The guy was hang down miserable the whole time.

“I felt not wanted, invisible, humiliated, hurt,” says Myers. Then she looked at him and saw something surprising. He was really hurting. Myers’
inner strength surfaced and she said do herself, ‘I can handle this.” A few hours later she asked him if he wanted to take her home.

“Yeah.”

This event catalyzed a key world view for Myers and became the early seeds for her work with women and leadership. “I knew I had to love and accept myself and continue connecting to who I am as a person and to connect to purpose.”

When she got home Myers took out some paper and made a line down middle. On one side she listed what was good about herself. On the other side she listed what was bad. On the “good” side she wrote. “I’ve got smarts. I’m not pregnant. I’m not sexually active. I do my chores. I follow rules. I go to school. I’m a nice person.”

On the “bad” side she wrote…well, nothing. “I had a really hard time finding something wrong from the inside out. I don’t like to dust and mom wants me to dust. That was a pivotal moment for me then. Writing became a powerful tool for self reflection.”

Today Myers keeps the essence of what’s on her list in mind. She stays focused on bringing out who she is no matter what she looks like on the outside. Even when she glances down at her sagging stomach, which she calls her “kangaroo pouch”, the aftermath of having quadruplets. She stops herself and says, “No. I make an offer in the world. I make a difference.”

Another practice she began after breaking her back kick boxing was to imagine a tea candle inside herself right below belly button. She took pain killers, as the pain was extreme, so she could continue to work as she was on the speaking circuit. Some days on stage the flame was tall and strong. But on other days it so small a light wind could kick it out.

At those times she would say to herself, “No DeeDee. How can you feed the flame?” She kept visualizing what she wanted with her kids. Myers says that we can locate virtues inside our bodies. For example, she houses courage in her diaphragm. That’s where she goes to find the energy to do a handstand in Yoga. Continuing to find the places where we house strengths can be self generative. By locating those parts we continually connect to what’s good in us.

This is not just an occasional practice. Myers practices being in the mind-set that her body is fulfilling on what it’s made for. “I go home everyday and ask myself, ‘Was this a day well lived?” She also envisions a happy future that helps drive the present. She’ll be 68 when her quadruplets graduate from high school. What’s important to her is to be able to run, laugh and enjoy her children and that she can also live fully in her body and be alive, alert, healthy, happy.

Deedee Myers is an executive leadership coach who supports sustainable changes for individuals, teams and organizations. She is a motivational speaker and author, teacher and coach on leadership practices, effective coordination in teams and living a life of Purpose and balance. As a former triathlete and ultramarathoner Deedee is well schooled in pacing as CEO of the Advancing Leadership Institute, and mother of 9 including twins and quadruplets.

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I was.

In my early teens I learned to eat in the closet, literally. I inhaled sweets. In the mornings before school I’d fake that I’d eaten a bowl of cereal by putting a few flakes and a dash of milk in the bowl and deposit it in the sink. Then I’d get into my father’s airtight cookie bin and take 10 Oreos up to my room and savor them privately, in my walk-in closet…with guilt. I was 5′2″ 105 pounds. I was athletic, popular, and never thought about barfing or purging. I wanted to lose 5 pounds. But I wasn’t about to give up cookies to do it.

What drove me into the closet was shame. Disapproving looks came first. Then words. Early on questions from my parents and relatives like, “Are you sure you want a second helping?” “Do you want to eat that?” “What, another cookie?” turned me into a sneak. I wanted to eat where I could enjoy myself. In private.

I ate because of the luxurious deliciousness of sugar. I ate for the pleasure of companionship with other girls my age when we bought Ho Hos and Ding Dongs and boxes of Entenmann’s cookies and talked for hours together about intimate things. Dessert and confidential conversations became synonymous with the creation of a secret world, the secret world of girls, soft and dreamy, behind locked bedroom doors where we could share our thoughts — without adult intrusion or snooping. This was short lived.

The intrusion of mothers came by example. One chubby mother would eat a whole box of chocolates and then say, “I hate myself.” Another friend’s slim mother would smoke cigarettes at the kitchen table lost in thought, easy in our presence, while my friend and I would eat home made bialys smeared with lox and cream cheese happily chattering away.

In time I came to recognize the difference between self destruction and punishment through food and eating food for nourishment and deepening the bonds of intimacy through shared experience and pleasure.

But I still have remnants of the sneak eating. The other day I bought a flourless chocolate cake for my book group meeting at our home. There were a few pieces left over so I put them in the laundry room out of sight so I would only eat a piece if I really wanted it. I found myself waiting until my sweetie left the kitchen to seek out those last morsels. I caught myself feeling the familiar impulse to hide.

So I put the cake back and waited until he returned and then ate a piece while enjoying his company. I’m building new neural pathways in my brain to eradicate the shame. Continuing to associate the pleasure of companionship with the enjoyment of food gives me those same good feelings I had with my girlfriends, filmy, fluid and fun. I even tell my sweetie a secret or two over pudding, lemon curd, or cake, and feel good about it.

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One of the major goals of the 1997 Body Image Survey was to learn more about how people have remade their image. Though we anticipated receiving a few brief suggestions, we were inundated with your personal accounts of change. We have summarized your suggestions but kept your words. Try and discover what factors play a role in your struggle with your body. And be deliberate about creating a lifestyle that increases your chances for ending the war with your body.

1. Develop criteria for self-esteem that go beyond appearance.
   One way to make appearance less important is to develop other benchmarks for self-evaluation. A 51-year-old woman from California summarizes the approach: “By achieving in other areas, balancing successes and failures, searching where positives are possible.” A 53-year-old Washington man says, “focusing on succeeding at work, participating in sports, and friendships have helped me overcome my negative body feelings.”
2. Cultivate the ability to appreciate your body, especially how it functions.
   One middle-aged women writes: “I have often wanted to write an article called ‘I Have a Beautiful Body.’ No. I don’t look like Jane Fonda. I look like a normal 46-year-old woman who has had three children. But my body is beautiful because of all it does for me. I have two eyes that can see, a large nose for smelling, a large mouth for eating and smiling, two hands that can hold and hug, two breasts that have nursed three sons, an abdomen that was home to three babies, two legs that can walk everywhere I want to go, and two feet to take me there.”

   “I have extremely red hair and as a child I hated it because it was so different,” says a 20-year-old woman from California. “I have come to realize that my hair is a beautiful and exotic part of me. Now I cherish it.”

3. Engage in behavior that makes you feel good about yourself.
   “When I have negative thoughts and feelings about my physical appearance, I try to behave in a way that turns them around, like exercise and buying a piece of clothing that enhances my appearance,” says a 30-year-old Missouri woman.”

   Although Rubenesque at age 54, I currently model nude for a local university art school, meditate daily to focus inward, and enjoy dancing, swimming, archery, art, and my writing projects,” says a Georgia woman.

4. Reduce your exposure to noxious images.
   “I stopped buying fashion magazines completely when I was about 24,” says a 30-year-old woman from Michigan. “Comparing myself to the models had a very strong and negative impact.”

   “One of the things that helped me become more accepting of my body was the realization that it was okay to be female,” says a 67-year-old woman from Ohio. “It sounds hokey, but watching old movies starring Sophia Loren and Ava Gardner helped. These women had shoulders, and breasts, and hips, and are some of the sexiest women I have ever seen.”

5. Exercise for strength, fitness, and health, not just weight control.
   “When I was able to stop focusing on how my body looked and began experiencing what it could help me accomplish — climbing, swimming, cycling, surviving in the wilderness — it made me feel extremely satisfied,” says a 28-year-old woman from Louisiana.”

   About a year ago I started walking every day for about an hour,” says a 22-year-old woman from New York. “Because I was walking I felt so good. I also lost 10 pounds, but that didn’t matter. My attitude changed because I cared about my health.”

6. Seek out others who respect and care about your body; teach them how to talk about and touch your body.
   “The most recent experience that has helped has been a lover,” says a 67-year-old Ohio woman. “He makes me glad to be in this body with this shape and these dimensions.”
7. Get out abusive relationships.
   “If my partner didn’t like my appearance, he would no longer be my partner,” says a 31-year-old woman from Alabama. “I eliminate the negative.”
8. Identify and change habitual negative thoughts about your body.
   “I constructed a tape of positive self-talk with personal goals and feelings I want to achieve,” says a 25-year-old Washington woman. “When I have a bad attitude about my body, I pop in my tape. It really helps improve my self-image.”

   “When I look in the mirror at my body I always try to say nice things rather than cringe,” continues the wise-beyond-her-years 25-year-old.

9. Decode more complicated thoughts about the body.
   Are negative thoughts and feelings about your body distracting you from other issues that are really bothering you? A 60-year-old woman writes: “A factor that has helped me come to terms with my body was recognizing that much of my relationship problems had more to do with shyness and lack of social skills than physical appearance. Once I worked on my people skills, found that I worried less about my appearance.”
10. If you can’t get over your bad body image, consider seeking professional help.
    “I was bulimic for 12 years,” says a 36-year-old woman from Oregon. “My recovery was based on individual counseling, support from friends, and a hell of a lot of hard work on my part.”
11. Control what you can, forget about what you can’t.
    “As far as negativity about my physical appearance,” says a 33-year-old woman from Michigan, “I’ve had one simple rule: work on improving what you can realistically change, and don’t spend time worrying about the rest.”

Read the whole article here.

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In the beginning her coaching practice attracted women who were living small lives, preoccupied by things that didn’t matter. Brown now attracts women who want to move into a state of joy and who have a substantial effect in the world with their presence, their words, their work.

“There’s a whole secret dialog that goes with that,” Brown says, speaking from her own personal experience. It’s often the seemingly small unimportant things that are having a large cumulative effect. In her shower stall, for example there is room on the shelf for three items across. Four of those were hers, two were her husband’s. She put hers in the back so he could access his more easily.

One day she thought, “Forget that. I’ve got more stuff I need more room.” So she moved her stuff to the front. Result? He didn’t even notice. “That`s when I realized there were so many little things I was deferring. Things that had bothered me for a long time. I was doing all this so it would be more convenient for my spouse, dismissing what was best for me.”

This may seem insignificant but these subtleties accumulate and suddenly women find themselves at a place where they’ve lost themselves in the process. “Smart women think this doesn’t happen to them,” says Brown, “And yet it does. I speak about this in terms of integrity, keeping a wholeness about yourself and your needs, keeping promises to yourself. You don’t gain or lose integrity in one choice but in the many choices over time.”

Another way that women give away their power is in how they make requests of others. For example, when a woman wants to go to the movies she may ask her spouse, “Do you still want to go to a movie today?” Asking in this way defers her own needs. Instead Brown recommends saying, “I’m going to go to a movie do you still want to join me?” This puts the power back in your hands as no matter what he says you’re still going and don’t have to explain it. Contrarily, if you say you’re going to go that could be construed as a subtle diss to him. Asking in this way you’re neither deferring your power nor being over-controlling. “True power doesn’t need to control or accommodate,” Brown notes.

In her practice Brown teaches non-judgement. That means not judging your body, what you eat, how you react at work or at home. “Judgement and learning can’t co-exist. If you choose to go down the path of judgement you set yourself up to go to this moment again and again and get stuck. Once you choose learning everything opens up and becomes curiosity-driven. It’s a compassionate lens and everything is new. This works even if you feel you need to go to store and indulge.” Brown recommends looking at that experience and recognizing that you may need to do it to learn from it as an experience of contrast to behaviour you actually want in your life.

“Notice “what is” and that truth is neutral. If you’re fighting reality you’re spending a lot of energy fighting “what is” and that energy isn’t available for other parts of your life.

Brown considers herself fortunate to have had coaches who were excited with whatever she brought to them no matter how “negative” or extreme. “They thought everything was ‘awesome’. They were my compassionate witness and my unconditional champion.” We need constants like this in our lives, whether it be a coach, parent, or friend who teach us, believe in us and see every act we do as revolutionary and necessary for our progress so we can internalize these qualities for ourselves.

Kathrine Brown, North America’s most innovative weight loss coach, is the developer of the process Conscious Weight Loss: weight loss while life happens and the publisher of the ezine Wisdom Connoisseur: your voice of clarity on weight loss, which has subscribers in 10 countries.

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