Usually this Japanese ritual which is centuries old, involves the guest, who observes the performance of the preparation and presentation of the tea, then eats traditional Japanese confections to enhance the taste of tea. After consuming the sweets the guest drinks green tea in a formalized manner. The untrained person makes the tea according to her own schedule, but part of the elegance and beauty of this ritual is similar to a dance between two people who are connected and moving together while maintaining their individuality.

In Aikido the inexperienced practitioner often drags his uke (attacker) along in his unskilled effort to throw him. In contrast the experienced Aikidoist harmonizes or blends his energy in order to guide his uke to where both the uke and the nage (thrower) wants to go. It’s about uke and nage aligning their bodies, mind, energy. Instead of doing something “to” someone you’re doing it “with” them. This comes with much practice, body to body.

Ginny Breeland, who has been practicing Aikido for over thirty years and is a 5th dan, says that the first step to becoming a skilled practitioner in Aikido or tea ceremony is to observe ourselves when we train. She advises that we notice how we react, what we need to change. “If you do that you don’t judge yourself you just see it,” she says. “Instead of coming to conclusions before we know the actual story, just observe.”

While these two processes develop a person’s sensitivity, capabilities, and strengths, many people will recognize that DO or “The Way” doesn’t have a direct translation/path journey. “It’s a nameless process that happens that leads you to wellness and growth,” says Breeland. They are both a type of mindfulness practice that begin to change the shape of your thoughts and actions over time.

Both paths are similar but different. Tea ceremony and Aikido can both be considered meditation in action, practices that emphasize stillness through movement. They require commitment and sometimes the work is arduous. “Not like a hobby,” says Breeland. But everything from finishing a book or a piece of art can be martial, she explains. “All the masters in every martial art discipline say it’s about peace, non-confrontation and maintaining peace and respect. Tea is a mindfulness practice that has its origins in Zen. Underneath that practice is the subtle understanding that it’s not necessary to have so many materialistic things to have happiness. In Aikido the practice is to turn lead into gold. The founder Morihei Ueshiba says, “True victory is self-victory.”

“These practices are not about learning to be good. They are about finding the goodness in yourself,” explains Breeland. One way to do that is to try something that requires commitment so people learn about themselves. Both the tea ceremony and Aikido are two paths that can bring you there. It’s not about words and knowing, but about feeling. Aikido and tea aren’t about making you a better speaker, but a better listener.

“People are looking for wellness and maybe they want to try it without a pill as there’s access to it in your own brain,” notes Breeland. “Look inside yourself first. Even if you don’t like what you see work with it and let’s see what we can do after that. As with any new learning you start with one good technique and put it in your pocket and slowly start to gather them.” This is part of the commitment to moving forward incrementally no matter what, using the tea ceremony, Aikido, or whatever you choose as the vehicle.

Join Ginny Breeland 5th Dan Aikido and Sachiko Knappman, urasenke tea practitioner for 2 hours of discussion and sensory exploration of tea and aikido on Sunday August 29, 10am-12pm in Cotati CA. Participation is optional. Contact Pete@cotatiaikido.com for information or registration.

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A couple of black belts volunteer to train anyone who wants to work on specific throws, techniques or to train for tests. I’m not fully awake first thing in the morning, but I roused myself because I wanted the practice so I could have some semblance of comfort…which turned out to be a pipe dream.

Half way through the first practice run one of the black belts said sternly, “You need to remember two things for your test. Don’t talk. And even if you don’t know what technique Sensei calls out just do something, anything. Don’t act like a deer frozen in the headlights, for God’s sake.”

I’m a verbal person and Aikido is virtually a silent art minus the chant or kiais (relaxed and powerful exhalation that coordinates breath with ki or energy during strikes or throws). I’m used to talking when I’m nervous so I can dissipate the excess energy and get to a place of calm. There isn’t an opportunity for this in Aikido. Your body does the talking. Period.

For me this is like asking a whale to walk. During practice I tend to work through techniques verbally along with the physical movement, talking out loud what I’m doing or asking uke about angle or balance, trying to figure out what’s working. I like to get feedback as it helps me understand what’s going on. Observation isn’t enough for me at this point as my “Aikido vision”  is still pretty blurry.

Part of all this had to do with seeing body as separate and uncontrolled being, as if it’s an alien from outer space. I can sometimes see what I need to do, but can’t yet will my body to do it. I know some of this is due to beginner’s ineptitude since I just haven’t done the techniques that many times.

As I was mulling this over I recalled how much practice time I put into tennis in my youth when I played competitively. At tennis camp I trained 8-10 hours a day doing drills with other people, with the ball machine, with a practice net, and against a wall. I hit thousand of balls working to ingrain the basic strokes. We jump roped, we ran, we did all kinds of exercises and drills to strengthen our muscles in addition to actually hitting the ball.

In the anticipation of trying to do well I tended to forget how much time I clocked to become fluent and agile at tennis. Plus, I had a lot more energy back then. And I didn’t need to pop Advil after a few hours of training. With tennis the goal is clear — connect the racquet to the ball and hit it where your opponent isn’t. In Aikido there is no such direct path.

With all my limbs moving in different directions and the various body types and personalities attached to those bodies with their own individual limbs, I can rarely figure out where I am in space and time. It’s as if I was in the space shuttle and up was down and down was up and all the in-between stuff was floating about in an aimless manner. There’s not sense of where the boundaries are or which direction I’m facing. It’s a topsy turvy world with no edges and no way to move forward directly. One can get lost in the circles, spirals and triangles if one is used to traveling in straight lines, which I am.

In addition to the “deer in the headlights” advice I got more direction that set me on edge. The other black belt said, “Stop worrying so much about what other people think of you and focus on the technique.” All the years of parental pressure to be number one, to be the best, to try try try, are evidently written on my sleeve.

What he saw in those moments wasn’t active agitation, it was background worry. A kind of slow whirr that’s on all the time that I’m so used to I barely notice. I thought I was focused on the technique, but I imagine that too much of my brain space was already taken up by errant thoughts of failure. With that being the case there wasn’t much room left for concentration.

At home, when I practiced visualizing each throw, little scenes of disaster would pop into my head and derail the graceful flowing sequence I was creating until the entire golden vision deteriorated into one big fiasco. In general my mind tends toward the moribund so I imagined things like my foot getting caught on my uke’s hakama and breaking my ankle or tonking my head so hard on the mat that it would trigger an epileptic fit. I could easily write The Worse Case Scenario Handbook for Martial Artists.

When the blunders, missteps and accidents nudged their way into this visualization, I’d breathe, reset and begin with the last positive thought before the foot in hakama ankle break took over. I recalled that a few days earlier during training Goto Sensei had been talking about how once you learn to breathe through a technique the breathing guides the technique effortlessly. But breathing takes a back seat when you don’t know where to put your feet.

Nonetheless while practicing at home on our deck I made breathing the focus as I moved through the various throws watching myself in the reflection in the glass doors. Being able to see myself helped me gain a sense of where I was in space and time. Now I just need to practice each technique thousands of times, breathing, relaxing and focusing to train my mind to just hear and see and feel what is going on in this moment, with this body, in this one breath.

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Susan Harrow

My Name Is Gabrielle Rubin And I Started Studying Martial Arts When I Was 12 Years Old. I Was A Skinny Kid With A Big Mouth And One Day Found Myself In Trouble Because Of It. I Hated Feeling Afraid, So I Asked My Mom To Enroll Me Into Martial Arts. It Is Now 23 Years Later And I Am Still Studying. Throughout My Training I Have practiced 3 Styles (Jujitsu, Kenpo, And Goju-ryu)…I Am A Black Belt.

I Always Say The Reason Why You Start Taking Martial Arts Is Always Different than Why you Continue To Take It. I Started For Self Defense And Continue With It Because It Is Now My Way Of Life. I Started As A Hyper, Obnoxious Kid And Transformed Into A Very Zen Person.

Martial Arts contribute To How I Handle And Perceive Things. People Always Say There Is Something About Me That Exudes A Strong Sense Of Self, Yet they Find Me Very Approachable. I Know That My Training Has Contributed To How I Carry Myself. I Am Calm, Yet Strong.

Martial Arts Has Always Played A Role In My Career As Well. Look At What My First Boss Wrote 8 Years After Knowing Me:

“When I First Met Gabi There Was Something Special And Unique Out Of All Her Qualifications On Her Resume That Jumped Out At Me – Her Black Belt In Karate. I Knew It Was Indicative Of Her Dedication, Confidence, Discipline, Mental Strength, And Strong Sense Of Self, And Would Be An Asset In Our Crazy, Ever-changing World Here. And They Were.” That Was Written By Christina Norman, Who Went On To Be The President Of MTV And Is Currently The CEO Of Oprah’s Network OWN.

So, Not Only Has Martial Arts Help Me Flourish In My Career, It Is The Backbone Of What I Am Doing Now.

I Felt Compelled To Share What I Have Learned Over The Years And To “pay It Forward”. I Decided To Take All My Training And I Started Female Awareness Self Defense In 2007. 

It Feels Amazing To Show People How To Use Their Body, Show Them How It Can Move/doesn’t Move. I Love Seeing Them Get Excited When They Discover Their Strength. There Is Always One Move They Love And Never Knew They’d Be Good At. There Is Usually A Technique They Can Attribute To Something In Their World. For Example: The Ones Who Have Played Tennis Are Great At Releasing From Someone Grabbing Their Arm. (The Move Is Swinging From The Back And “slapping” Their Other Thigh-similar To Tennis Serve)

The People In My Class Always Walk Away Feeling More Confident, Happy, Empowered And Excited. My Class Covers Much More Then Just The Physical, Which Is How I Separate Myself From The Pack. Knowing that Attacks Begin Before It’s Physical, I Show Women The Mental Component, How To See The Signs, How To Assess Situations, And How To Carry Themselves So They Can Avoid An Attack Altogether. Most People Think That Martial Arts Is All Physical. That Is Only A Small Part Of It…

If You Would Like To Speak With Me About Anything In Further Detail Or Ask Me Anything For Your Article, Please Feel Free To Reach Out To Me, I Would Be Delighted To Contribute More.

PS – I Love Aikido And Suggest That Style To Those Who Want To Further Their Studies. I Love The Idea Of Using Other People’s Energy And Going With It As Oppose To Trying To Fight Or Stop It. My Life Is Conducive To That Way Of Living. My Mantra: If You Fight The Rapids You Will Drown, Bob With Them Like A Cork And You Will Always Stay Above The Water.

Gabrielle Rubin is the founder and instructor of Female Awareness, Inc., a New York City based self defense company with the goal of teaching women how to Be Safe, Be Smart and Be Strong. A black belt with more than 20 years of martial arts training, Gabrielle has studied three styles of karate: Goju-ryu, Kenpo and Jujitsu. She has trained in Japan, taught in Nevis, and studied with sensei George Wells, a Martial Arts Hall of Fame Grand Master. In her NYC dojo, Gabi is not only the highest-ranking student; she’s the only woman to maintain her title.

“Since I believe that attacks begin before it becomes physical, preventing an attack altogether is the goal of Female Awareness. My students learn how to minimize the chance of being targeted and how to respond effectively through mental strategy, prevention tactics, and easy-to-remember defensive moves.”

For open enrollment classes, private group instruction, corporate seminars, school safety programs, please visit Gabrielle’s web site.

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Susan Harrow

I grew up surrounded by a family of Aikido experts.  My brother and father began training at NY Aikikai more than 40 years ago, and my Uncle and cousins in England all hold high level degree black belts in the art. I took a few classes in Aikido as well, for a short time when I was twelve years old. You can say that the Martial Arts are in my blood!

It wasn’t until six weeks after the birth of my second child, and at the age of 35, that I began MY ‘formal’ Martial Arts training.  Signing up for classes at Tiger Schulmann’s Mixed Martial Arts (a hybrid of Aikido, Jiu Jitsu and Karate) back in February of 2000 was the best move I ever made – it changed my life for the better! I lost more than 40 lbs and gained a tremendous amount of self-confidence and discipline. I earned my first degree black belt in November of 2003 – one of the highlights of my life.  Training has become a way of life for me!

In addition to my continued MMA training, and having been a huge Bruce Lee fan my entire life, I signed up for JKD (Jeet Kune Do) classes. Jeet Kune Do translates as “The way of the intercepting fist”.  I love Bruce’s philosophy of using ‘No Way as Way’, and that each individual has his or her own ‘style’.

When I turned 40 years old I was in the best shape of my life, both mentally AND physically.  I was in better shape than most 20 year olds!  I became a Certified Personal Trainer and started my own part time/in home personal training business – Tigress Personal Fitness.   In addition, I teach women’s self defense and safety awareness – of which I am extremely passionate!

In 2008, after my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer,  I founded the ‘Moms Who Kick’ – a non-profit organization – to help raise awareness and funds for breast cancer research.  The monies raised are donated to the American Cancer Society. To date, the Moms Who Kick have raised more than $25,000!  The Moms Who Kick is a unique twist on a very important issue.  It began as an idea consisting of Martial Arts Moms, over 40 years old, ‘Kicking for the Cure’!

In a nutshell:  The Martial Arts help me in my business by giving me the tools and confidence to train others.

I am a strong, motivated and passionate leader.

At the age of 45, I am in the best physical and mental condition I have EVER been in, and as a result,  I LOVE my body!    I have a high level of self confidence, self discipline and self esteem.

I have a strong sense of empowerment and inner strength – and I attribute it all to my Martial Arts training!

Joanne Hutchins is a Certified Personal Trainer and a First Degree Black Belt in Karate.

She delivers powerful and motivational safety seminars to corporations and women’s groups.

Joanne is the Founder of the ‘Moms Who Kick’, a not-for-profit organization whose mission is to raise funds and awareness for breast cancer research. More information can be found at http://www.MomsWhoKick.com and http://www.TigressPersonalFitness.com

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Susan Harrow

Training in Aikido has changed my life personally and professionally. For the past 15-plus years, I’ve been practicing Aikido both on and off the mat. I founded Portsmouth Aikido (Portsmouth, NH, USA) in 1995, and am currently a second degree black belt. I’m also the founder and owner of Power & Presence Training, offering programs on conflict and communication skills that use Aikido as a metaphor and teaching tool. In 2006, I wrote the book, Unlikely Teachers: Finding the Hidden Gifts in Daily Conflict – stories and practices about Aikido applications in the real world. I happen to think the stories are dramatic and moving, and some are profound. You can read two chapters on my Web site.

Since you practice Aikido, you know how many ways the principles can be used in daily life. Personally, I’ve learned through Aikido how to be more assertive. As a natural accommodator and appeaser, my patterned response in conflict is to try to make everyone happy. Practicing Aikido has helped me find my power and my voice in difficult situations. When appropriate, I can now more easily say no, ask for what I want, and express a difference of opinion. Aikido’s emphasis on tanden or one-point has taught me how to center myself and that centering is a choice I can make at any time. When I’m centered, I’m calmer, more confident, and wiser. I’m able to connect with my best intentions and lead others by aligning with theirs.

Aikido’s emphasis on using the opponent’s energy has helped me (and helps my clients) transform conflict into opportunity and resistance into connection. Aikido helps with inner conflicts, too. The link below is a story from my monthly newsletter, Ki Moments, that applies to many women, I think.

Judy Ringer is the author of Unlikely Teachers: Finding the Hidden Gifts in Daily Conflict. She provides conflict and communication training throughout North America with unique workshops based on mind/body principles from the martial art Aikido, in which she holds a second-degree black belt.

Judy is also the author of two CDs, Managing Conflict in the Workplace: An Aiki Approach, and Simple Gifts: Making the Most of Life’s Ki Moments, as well as the award-winning newsletter, Ki Moments.

Judy is founder of Portsmouth Aikido and sole owner of Power & Presence Training, in Portsmouth, NH.

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Susan Harrow

Martial Arts for Women: Presence and Intent Helps Resolve Conflict Quickly
By Ginny Breeland

Call me the reluctant aikidoka. I was a skeptic (not a cynic), a doubting Thomas (not a disbeliever), and a pragmatist (not a non-conformist). For a length of time Aikido was nothing to me but exercise. 30 years ago my sister dragged me into my first Aikido class. I was 18 ys old and knew nothing of the art, but such things happen for reasons for it was there that I met my future husband, #1 fan, and uke, Pete.  Regardless of how it all began, Aikido has had a profound impact on my life.

It may have been my size, 5′ 100 lbs that led me to question whether I could really do this art. The philosophy seemed too esoteric. But since I was a good student, I learned the techniques and my husband and I continued practicing. He, my mentor and my security blanket. We practiced for years and progressed.  When I got my black belt I was still insecure but felt I better attend to my studies more seriously because here I now stood with this great big black flag called a hakama.

How has it affected my business?  I have worked as a cytotechnologist in a pathology lab for the last 25 years. Doctors were my bosses and I had always done my job quietly and efficiently. I kept my good opinions to myself even when I disagreed with conclusions and diagnosis. Aikido gave me the confidence and foresight to be able to stand toe to toe with my superiors. Notice, toe to toe, not head to head (or headlong).

Aikido taught me how to approach indirectly and end up side by side. I was able to get my opinions heard and acknowledged. The model of conflict resolution that constructs Aikido physically had entered my interaction off the mat. I began to understand. Aikido allowed me to make my point with no threat, and with more certainty. It often left my superiors confused but not antagonized. In Aikido you make his intent your intent so your intent can be ‘heard’. It also taught me how to give respect and receive respect as well. It changed how people at work approached me and some were puzzled.

With my 2nd degree black belt I started to teach, again with reluctance, after all what could I teach a 6 foot tall man? But this was the greatest opportunity of growth.  Sometimes I messed up, so I understood what it meant to invest in loss, because I learned. At the time I only had begun to carry myself with confidence, thank goodness my Sensei knew more about me than I did. But I still felt not taken seriously as a woman, men walked past me to train with other men. I decided it was my presence. My brain had to be fixed.  here was nothing I could do about my size and gender, but a lot I could do about my Presence.

When I became 3rd degree black belt the growth continued. It was a very physical time of learning. I consumed every style and training I could while balancing a family and job. I practiced many styles but kept my Iwama core. The problem was it just a very good outer physical core. It was really not until I was a 4th degree black belt that I suddenly felt one with my sword and jo. What a surprising feeling. I had thought I had accomplished this long ago, when I knew all the katas and taught them. But not really, now this oneness was an epiphany. I learned the dimensions like words. The differences between attention, concentration, and focus. These words are not the same and yet I had treated them so. Once again I was humbled and decided to take some steps back and stop assuming I knew. Truth was, the more you know, the more you do not know.

It was at this time of immense growth that life collapsed when my son became seriously ill and permanently disabled. Sometimes it is through the randomness and the wanderings in life that the depth and severity of existence is revealed. Through trauma, life change, or the simple pursuit for deeper meaning do we discover the path for simple existence. What was complex was now easy. What was arduous was now a daily endeavor, and what was difficult has oddly a shown pathway of the coexistence of joy and pain. Since our bodies carry our histories, when I returned to Aikido, a couple of years later, I had totally changed and so had my Aikido. Techniques became more acute, basics were the advanced material. I dispensed with useless showy movement. The universe had shifted from me to now my uke being the center of the universe and I in the periphery. I also felt a responsibility to contribute in helping humanity.

O Sensei had a military position in WWII as it began and perhaps of what he witnessed caused him to retreat into the country and create Aikido. The art that resolves conflict preserving both attacker and defender. He manipulated limbs to their natural extent and immobilized his opponents with closed circles (arm locks) or open circles (throwing uke) limbs were manipulated to full extent but not broken. What was his motivation? The atrocities of war? Aikido is known as the art of peace.

In all martial arts there are more similarities then differences. Masters get past the physical and encourage avoidance of conflict as well. Better to move like a shadow, respond like an echo, rest like a mirror, conform like water.

In our daily lives how can this affect us? What are we able to do even though we do not practice any martial arts? And if we do, how do we past the physical? The physical in martial arts is necessary, though other work can lead toward understanding service and peace. Commitment and arduous work in one form or another is all that is required.  Some of what we can do is:

1. Do your best everyday.
   There are few perfect warriors, our goal is to try and be impeccable.
2. Live like and respect nature.
   Accept things as they are, follow the natural course of things and be patient, don’t always expect instant results.
3. Be aware.
   Look so you can really ‘see’. Hear so you can feel what is happening around you. Feel so you can sense.  Follow but be the first to move.
4. Have compassion with wisdom so limits are not exhausted.
   Care for every being not just those you can gain from but the disheartened and the lost.
5. Tend to your own fruitfulness.
   Claim your own space. Meditate, Laugh, be Brave. Be in the company of those who promote health.

Martial arts provides a physical meditation. Hard work, leaving your zone of comfort, willingness and open mindedness allow you to arrive at the door to be ready to be of service to others much sooner than simply wanting to look good. As we move along with life we realize that what we thought was our own learning should ultimately transfer into a desire to teach and care for others like nature with no discrimination and no expectations in return. There are many pitfalls along the way. Aikido has illuminated dimensions for me and still I know there is more. I continue to study as it never ends, it is a lifelong process.

Ginny Breeland, 5th Dan, studied Exfoliative Cytology at the UCSF Medical center and has worked in a Pathology lab for over 25 years as a Cytotechnologist. Ginny has combined studying the brain and the art and science of learning/teaching. She and her husband, Pete, have trained for over 30 years and teach at Cotati Aikido. Ginny has taught Aikido for over ten years, integrating ideas on brain science, the balance between the right and left, yin and yang, the body and logic, the unconscious and the conscious. Ginny uses all of this in her mission to make Aikido accessible to anyone and everyone.

Favorite Morihei Ueshiba (founder of Aikido) quote: “The Art of Peace begins with you. Work on yourself and your appointed task in the Art of Peace. Everyone has a spirit that can be refined, a body that can be trained in some manner, a suitable path to follow…apply the Art to all that you encounter.”

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Susan Harrow

Martial Arts Background
I began my Aikido training in January 1982 at age thirty-three. I carry the rank of 6th degree black belt. I am the founder and director of Society of Aikido Centers since 2002.

How has martial arts helped you in your business?
Being an Aikido teacher has become my business career. It has helped me to focus on one thing at a time as we were taught in randori (freestyle). That being in a calm state helps us make better decisions. Whereas I was shy, I learned to be assertive.

Are you a better leader?
I continue to develop myself personally to be a better leader. The expansion of going through the personal transformation compelled me to write my first publication “The Martial Art of Life, The Art of Intentional Living” which is about the concepts that helped the self-actualization to take place.

How has training in martial arts has changed the way you feel about your body?
In 1982, at age 33 and being 5’1″ and 84 lbs, I studied martial arts for self-defense reasons. I was shy, reactive and took most things personally. My self-esteem was not very high. In the study of Aikido, you begin to learn about the mind, body, and spirit connection. As we learn to manage energy, we connect with our spirit. By connecting to our spirit, you can connect with intent. The whole basis behind Aikido is rooted in intent.

As I began to develop in the art, I learned how to use my body in a way which wasn’t based on physical strength. The mind and spirit have no size and I found the mental and spiritual aspects especially intriguing. Only when I saw myself in photos or videos, then I understood why others made such comments about my small stature. However, as I continued to train and focus on internal energy, the students on the receiving end began to feel the power of my movements. Something had changed and my perception of myself was transforming. What my size reflected was not my identity.

When you started what has the training taught you?
It has taught me that we create an image of ourselves and others are picking up the vibration of how we feel about ourselves. If we focus on our lack of, they feel it. If we focus on self-development, we will always be successful.

I went through a personal struggle in the beginning of my training since I couldn’t understand how my size could be effective. I was frustrated and from the student’s perspective it looked like I wouldn’t survive, but my spirit would not allow it.

Where you are now and how has it affected your image of yourself?
It is now twenty-eight years later. In 2002, in my twentieth year I created my own organization, Society of Aikido Centers. It also placed me in a position of being the first female to head an international Aikido organization in the U.S. I was discovering who I was being the “leader” which meant being the creator, innovator and learning how to manage the organization which consisted of 90% male students. Throughout my training because of my physical stature, my rank and being a female, I was consistently tested by the male students. I had to learn this art and learn it well. Now in my early sixties at 5’1″ and 96 lbs. with six grandchildren, I am still discovering the creativity of this profound art. When you make changes on the inside, the outside will change on its own. It is better to be the real you because when you root your movements in fear, it is always wrong.
What could help other women feel calm, centered and confident?
I teach using ‘soft gaze’ in my classes. Being in soft gaze allows a person to see the attackers in an unfocussed way, to look at them as part of a scene as opposed to looking at them directly. By doing this they can center very easily in the same way when someone walks behind them. By staying calm and feeling the situation, the field of energy, then you will know when to move. It’s that field of energy fluctuation that is the information necessary to move before you are touched. The way to be centered is not to focus. You can immediately feel the switch from being apprehensive, fearful and reactive to feeling calm, centered and being responsive in the moment. I encourage the students to use it as often as they can to heighten their awareness. This is one of the best tips I would give anyone.

I’d like to hear a dramatic, moving, profound before and after story.
Although I was making great strides in my profession as an Aikido instructor, there were challenges in my personal life that needed to be understood. I felt encumbered by past issues, issues in the present and fears that there was nothing I could change and the very fear of change. When I look back I could see that this encapsulated my life and showed in my appearance and in my beliefs.

Then a door opened and the concepts were through that door. The concepts which were given to me to write the book are profound and different from the traditional Aikido principles. High spiritual beings channeled through a medium instructed me on understanding of how the universe works. This is when things started to develop. I didn’t feel alone anymore and I became a little bit stronger. As I became stronger, I pushed away the negativities in my life. I wrote how these concepts of the universe work and I am now passionate about my life, my endeavors, my focus and my destiny. Once you begin on this path, there is no going back. I was actually teaching these concepts without applying them because I did not know they could be applied. I use these concepts more all the time and even when I begin to feel otherwise, I mentally say “I’m capable of handling this.” These concepts change your existence.

Lynn Fabia is an Aikido teacher (6th degree black belt), lecturer and author. She has always had a deep desire for higher understanding. Although she was making great strides in her profession as an Aikido instructor, there were challenges in her personal life that needed to be understood. My journey began as one who was shy, reactive and fearful of many things, causing me to be limited in my understanding of life. Then a door opened and the life concepts were through that door that took me to a place in my mind and spirit that changed my life forever. Her book “The Martial Art of Life, The Art of Intentional Living” is based on the teachings of high spiritual beings that have availed her the opportunity to learn some of the most powerful tools in mankind’s interactions. Read her personal transformation to self-actualization.

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Susan Harrow

A friend taught me some Aikido moves back when I was in my 20s – I did not have the money to study it formally then, but showed the moves to my boyfriend who was delighted with how a small woman could move a much larger man with almost no effort.

Long story short, my boyfriend became my husband and we both started studying Tai chi chuan back in the 1980s. Why Tai Chi? Because my husband was throwing out his neck doing plastering and the chiropractor told him to do some kind of exercise that would balance out the sides of his body. I took it up just for health and to help handle stress. My husband, Rick, studied intensively with Master William CC Chen in Manhattan. I did it once in a while. 

Years went by, Master Chen told Rick to start teaching. At this point we had three children and a small construction company. When he started teaching, I started going to his class and really learning tai chi. The form was great for health and stress reduction, but I found that push hands was incredible for me. Push hands is a two person exercise where you try to throw your partner off balance. (and to maintain your own balance while doing so) There were not a lot of women in class, so I got to practice push hands with a lot of men. Since they were almost all bigger, stronger and more aggressive than I was, I leaned to neutralize incoming force by deflecting, by getting out of the way, by finding their weak spots and being faster then they were.

Not only did I get stronger and more balanced, but I became confident that I could at least confront incoming force. Tai chi also has martial applications and it was fun and empowering to know how to disengage from grabs easily, how to deflect force, etc. 

Years went by. The construction company hit rough times and went bust. I went back to work in an office to handle finances while Rick started to study Polarity Therapy while continuing to teach Tai Chi. Rick started teaching a yearly workshop in Sedona, Arizona called TaiChi Alchemy, bringing together Tai Chi students and teachers from around the country to share approaches, exercises, knowledge of internal martial arts. 

It was at this yearly workshop that I met incredible women from around the country. All of these women practice tai chi, some teach it, some are accomplished and some are beginners. They have various occupations, an artist in Florida, a poet in NY, a musician in Connecticut, a homeopathic physician in CA, etc.,etc. We have been doing this workshop once a year for the past 15 years. You can see some photos on my husbands website.

Years went by. Rick wrote a book about his approach to Tai Chi. My whole take on it changed. Learned to practice energetic coherence. Got more and more into internal energy and using least amount of effort to do the job. Realized that I was using these principals constantly in my life and work. Started seeing correlations between the tai chi practice and energy medicine. Realized that I was rarely ever sick these days. (not true 10 years ago) As one of Ricks senior students, I help to coach others. The past couple years, Rick has been teaching us a new approach to push hands, and I have seen women in particular blossom with this approach. Confronting incoming energy of any sort – physical, emotional, mental – is easier. Awareness is up. Reaction time is way up. Ability to deal with whatever comes up is now effortless.   Meanwhile, raised my kids, have been working in IT for the past 15 years. My daughter, who graduated from college last year, considers the TaiChi Alchemy workshop crowd to be her extended family. 

If you want tips for women to get centered, etc., let me know and I will get you info on energetic coherence. I do not have a business and am not a leader, so I probably wouldn’t be right for your article. However, I know lots of taichi women, so perhaps I can put you in touch with someone who would qualify. Tell me what you are looking for and Ill reach out to the tai chi community. 

I really think you need to consider writing about Tai Chi. Internal energy cultivation is possible for women of all ages. (I’m 60 now and better than I ever was at push hands and applications) Its a martial art that can be done at any age. It increases balance and overall health, and it can totally help you deal with life with equanimity.

Maria Barrett has been practicing tai chi chuan for almost 30 years. Tai chi works with internal energy rather than muscular force. Coherent energy can be incredibly strong, fast and effective. As a senior student of her husband, Rick Barrett, Maria especially enjoys helping students to be comfortable with incoming force and with their own power. She is a big fan of using taichi principles in life, to handle physical, mental, emotional energy, and to feel good in your own skin.

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Susan Harrow

How has doing martial arts helped you in your business?  Martial arts have given me more focus, discipline and confidence over the years in both sales and marketing for major fashion designers and now running my own art business.

Are you a better leader?  I feel that I am a more confident leader. I also have learned through martial arts that you cannot B.S. yourself. Either you have what it takes to enter the fray, you develop what you need or you stay out of harm’s way.

How has training in martial arts has changed the way you feel about your body?  Since I was a model for several years–including swim wear and lingerie–I have always had a good body image. However martial arts gave me an additional and fun way to stay in shape. And frankly, when you have a good body you need confidence to say “no” to a lot of people in a lot of situations.

I’d like to hear dramatic, moving, profound before and after stories. Where you started, what training has taught you, where you are now and how it’s affected your image of yourself. I first started training right after I married my husband artist Pablo Solomon. He had trained since childhood and was a master of several styles ( he even did classes for the Queen’s Guard in the Netherlands). However, he felt that I would benefit more if I had a teacher other than him. So he had me train with a Chinese master of Wing Chun literally in a room in the back of the guy’s restaurant–real movie stuff. The Wing Chun style was actually started by a female Buddhist monk several hundred years ago. It depends on slipping and deflecting attacks. I had never done anything like this before and it was both interesting and made me feel as if I could defend myself.

Actually, I never had to use my martial arts directly (although on our honeymoon in Mexico we were attacked on a moon light walk on the beach and Pablo kicked the crap out of three attackers using jujitsu throws). However, the alertness and confidence that I had gained saved my life at least once. I was working for Diane von Furstenberg in sales and marketing and was returning to my car on an open parking lot after a sales meeting. I could see a man stalking me and trying to circle me to approach me. I had an umbrella with me so I just dropped my briefcase and purse, took a strong stance and pointed my umbrella menacingly at the guy and shouted in a command voice “get away!” The guy was so shocked he actually left like a scared dog.

I’m also after concrete tips that would help other women become more calm, centered, confident.The best tip I can give is to use breathing, posture and focus at all times ( yoga is good for this also). The number one practical tip is to be alert and aware of your surroundings. Also, trust your instincts. If a situation feels wrong–get out. Do not worry about appearing paranoid, insensitive, etc. Just listen to that internal alarm and move. Also, always fight. It is better to be taken to the hospital from a parking lot after resisting and being shot or stabbed than to be kidnapped and raped and tortured to death over a long period of torment.

I’m particularly interested in Aikido because of the “way of harmony” philosophy and since I began training a year ago. Aikido is a hybrid of Japanese sword technique and jujitsu. Pablo is very good at Aikido as well as several other arts. His comment is that Aikido is very good but requires many years of training to reach a point where it will do you a lot of good on the street. His advice to me and most other women is to carry an ice pick. If you are too timid to rip out a rapist’s eyes, you probably don’t really value your life very much.

Please let me know the type of martial arts you do, how long you’ve been training, and your rank. I have trained formally and with Pablo for the 35 years of our marriage. Let’s just say that I can defend myself. As Pablo who has taught martial arts around the world says, ” A real master worries more about his belt holding up his pants than about its color impressing others.”

My name is Beverly Solomon and am currently Creative Director for musee-solomon. I was a model and then an account executive in sales and marketing for Diane von Furstenberg, Revlon and Ralph Lauren. I now live and work with my husband internationally recognized artist Pablo Solomon on our 1856 historic ranch in the Texas Hill Country north of Austin. I manage our art business and also provide expertise in the areas of art, fashion and beauty. I have been featured in books, newspapers, magazines and TV. You can see me at http://www.beverlysolomon.com/

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I asked powerful women in martial arts how training in their discipline helped them overcome issues, be stronger leaders and become more confident in themselves and less-self conscious of their bodies. I received so many replies from amazing women I decided to do a Martial Arts Mini Series. I hope you enjoy their stories of strength and endurance as much as I do.

~ Susan Harrow

Shy to High-Flying Tae Kwon Do Master
By Evelyn Weiss Francisco

At age 27, I achieved a goal of black belt in Tae Kwon Do and Hapkido. I started training in 1993, and after four years of consistent training four times per week, I tested and received my black belt, which was the new beginning to my continued training and the satisfaction of reaching a short-term goal. I was the only woman at my test. It took extreme dedication and lots of physical endurance to complete an eight-week-long test that included self defense, sparring, board-breaking (I kicked through six at once – more than any of the men who tested.) and kicking and hand techniques.

Last week, at 39 years old, and after a year of two tae kwon do-injury-related surgeries, I just passed a three-hour final test (8 weeks long) for 4th-degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do (Master) and continue to train and practice my art religiously. Martial arts has empowered me both mentally and physically. It instills confidence in me in everything I do.

I was in a stale but comfortable position as an administrative assistant for a supermarket co-op. But the more I progressed in martial arts, the more it re-enforced my goal-oriented nature and my desire to excel. I am now the director of client services at Caryl Communications, a public relations firm.

By dealing with pain and overcoming challenges, confidence becomes ingrained through both inner and external strength. Being able to spar well against women and men, and being able to kick just as hard – if not harder – than a lot of the martial artists in my school, disproves the notion of women being “weak”. It helps me to feel self-assured in the workplace when communicating with executives who are my clients.

I used to be very shy and intimidated by high-ranking business people and used to let stress affect me emotionally when I would have multiple deadlines. The physical aspect of martial arts becomes a daily stress reliever and allows me to cope with all levels of work-related and other stress factors in a calmer and more logical manner. I now have the confidence to know that I can, and will, complete tasks given to me.

I also used to be very self-conscious, and while that hasn’t completely gone away, knowing that I can protect myself physically, somehow makes me walk taller and appear strong and confident at only 130 pounds. That alone makes me less of a potential victim to a predator. I am well aware of my surroundings at all times.

Evelyn Weiss Francisco is director at a public relations firm and a 4th Dan Master in Tae Kwon Do. She has been training for 16 years and has conducted women’s self-defense safety seminars. To exercise her mind and for mental therapy, she writes poetry.

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