Posts Tagged ‘self love’
Have you ever felt that at times your lover is your worst enemy? It sure can appear so in the middle of a fight. Sometimes this person you love, whom you thought you knew, turns into an the Creature From the Black Lagoon. You don’t have a clue as to what changed them from their mildly mannered self into someone you’d want to commit to an insane asylum.
Being overly sensitive to how people judge us isn’t always a sign of low self-esteem; confident women also worry about how other’s view them. We are supposed to be perfect so we work hard to maintain this status. As a successful high-achiever, I have had to learn to take risks, love myself even when I make mistakes, and appreciate my aging body.
“Our stories are in us from a long time ago,” says DeeDee Myers a leadership trainer, speaker, triathlete and mother of quadruplets, twins and three other children. One of her core life stories came as age 16 on her first date. She met a cute boy at a football game on a chilly day so Myers was wearing a jacket. When Myers greeted him at the door when he came to pick her up she immediately saw the look on his face. She said, “I thought, ‘Oh my God, he doesn’t want to go out with me because I only have one arm.’”
DeeDee Myers is never without a tube of lipstick in her purse. Leadership expert, triathlete and mother of quadruplets, twins and three other children, she’s always prepared, always presentable, no matter what. In Eighth grade her mother told her that she needed all the help she could get given that she was born with only one arm.
Last week I performed an experiment. I took off my clothes at my friends house in front of her and her 15 year old daughter.
Why? Because I want to feel completely unencumbered by my body.
You don’t have to sleep with or have been raped by your dad to feel bad about yourself, your body or your sexuality. The Mackenzie Phillips revelation, while shocking, is more common that most of us would like to believe. 1 out of every 6 American women have been the victims of an attempted or completed rape in their lifetime (National Institute of Justice & Centers for Disease Control & Prevention. Prevalence, Incidence and Consequences of Violence Against Women Survey. 1998.).
Today the world told me that I should leave my aches and pains to someone who really knows. Someone who has cancer, or a brain tumor, or whose leg has been chewed off by a wolf.
Today the world told me to let up a little, to not push so hard at doing. I ask myself, “What is rest?” And I must say he’s a poor acquaintance, and often unwelcome at my door.
Today the world told me that perhaps what I wish for is something not so big. A little loosening around the waist and eyes could be good, to let in a little more seeing and a little less thinking.
I was at an event recently when I was dissed. It wasn’t a mean diss, or even a conscious one for that matter. And that kind of made it worse.
I was talking to a colleague who I respect. We were chatting away and suddenly his head turned and locked. Silence. He became mesmerized. No, his brain froze or fried on the spot when a tall woman wearing a tight bright top revealing the exact shape of her breasts began to dance. Her pants hung so low you could almost glimpse her betty.